Alimentary, my dear Watson, alimentary

The Columbia River runs through our region in much the same way as the alimentary canal runs through the human body. Liquids go in one end and come out the other. We do the best we can to ensure that the liquids going in are free of herbicides, pesticides and other toxins because we want our bodies, and the river, to remain healthy.

Now, let's suppose that one day a man came to you and asked, "How would you like to make money transporting toxic substances from point A to point B?"

You might ask for details.

He would say, "It's easy. All you need to do is swallow these balloons filled with cocaine and then carry them from here to there. After you get safely to the other side, we'll separate the bags of cocaine from your excretions, and then we'll remove the cocaine from the bags."

You might ask, "And why would I do this?"

"For the money, of course."

"How much money?"

"Enough. But most of the money will go to people far away who don't care a hoot about you or your health."

"So, if one of the bags were to break, if there is a leak, what would happen to me?"

"You'd probably die," the man would say. "But rest assured, that won't happen. We double-bag the cocaine. Those bags can't break. We are very, very safety conscious."

You weigh the hazards against the rewards, say "No, thank you," and go about your business.

Now let's suppose that on another day another man came to you and asked, "How would you like to make money transporting toxic substances from point A to point B?"

Once again, you asked for details.

The man explained, "It's easy. All you need to do is give approval for trains filled with coal and oil to run through the Columbia River Gorge."

You might ask, "How would this benefit me?"

And he'd reply, "It will provide jobs to train engineers and to workers at the terminal. If you have one of those jobs, you'll benefit directly. Otherwise, the region will benefit indirectly. Most of the money will go to people far away who don't give a hoot about you, the river or Oregon. "

"If one of the containers were to break, if there was a spill, what would happen to the river? What would happen to the animals in the river?

The man, if he were honest, would not mince his words. "The river would get very, very sick. And if the spill happened during a salmon run, the entire species might be wiped out. But let me assure you, there is absolutely no chance of a break, and absolutely no chance of a spill. Everything is double-hulled. We are very, very safety conscious."

The man might add, "We also want you, the Oregon tax-payer, to give us money to rebuild the terminal in St. Helens where we unload coal."

Last week, the Oregon Transportation Commission had to vote on this issue. Ambre Energy, a coal and oil shale company headquartered in Brisbane, Australia, and Salt Lake City had asked for a subsidy of $2,000,000. On Thursday, March 19, the OTC turned down Ambre Energy's request. Thank you OTC and, in particular, thank you Tammy Baney, Chair.